I’m in a bad mood. Not a great place to be. Lately I have just felt stagnant, like nothing is happening. Like I’m going through the motions and I have nothing to go to. Like I know where I am supposed to be and I’m not there yet.
I am working my butt off and nothing is happening. I am getting up every day and doing the same thing I did the day before. Life has stopped, but it is still going.
A friend of mine compared it to sitting in a stagnant pool. The mosquitoes are breeding around you – and biting you – nipping at you – irritating you – and you can’t move because there is nowhere to go.
This puts you in a bad mood.
Not really an angry mood – but a sad one. I don’t think I’ve stopped crying in a month. I think I’m all right and then – #boom – the floodgates start.
And I really don’t know exactly why I’m crying except for the fact that everything is the same. And I know there is more.
I am tired. Tired and worn. There is a song entitled “Worn” by Tenth Avenue North that says, “I’m tired, I’m worn. My heart is heavy. From the work it takes to keep on breathing.”
That is where I am. Tired of breathing in a stagnant pool.
Tenth Avenue North’s song goes on to say, “I’ve let my hope fail. My soul feels crushed by the weight of this world.”
That is where I am – I’ve let my hope fail. God has told me what to hope for, and I see no hope of anything ever coming to pass.
Listen to scripture.
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12
Hope deferred makes the heart sick. Isn’t that the truth? Let me say that again: Hope deferred makes the heart sick.
My heart is sick. My hope is gone.
That is not truth, but that is how I feel. I know hope isn’t gone because my hope is God, but at times I feel so drained that it feels my hope is gone. How did Abraham feel, waiting for God’s promise of a son to be fulfilled? He wanted a son so badly. How did he feel, waiting year after year, with no results? Did his hope feel gone? He believed (Genesis 15:6) but did he carry hope like a blanket? Or did he let his hope fade? Well, obviously, he let it fade for after God promised him a son (Genesis 15) Abraham took matters into his own hands (Genesis 16) and had a child by his wife’s handmaid.
Or what about David? He was crowned king when he was a youth (1 Samuel 16) but he didn’t rise to sit on the throne for probably over fifteen years. He even had to run away from a king who was trying to kill him! David believed in God, but at times his hopes failed. He wrote about his feelings in the Psalms.
“Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!” Psalm 4:1
“How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me?” Psalm 13:1
David believed, but his hope failed. At times yours will too. So will mine – obviously – but we need to cling to the truth.
God never fails. And God is ultimately our hope. Our hope is not in the “thing” God is telling us will come to pass. It is not in the “person” God is telling us to wait for. It is not in the “circumstances” God says will be realized. It is in Him. Our hope is Him because He never fails. If we trust Him and not in the circumstances, things, or people He is leading us toward, we can remain confident that whatever God declares will come to pass because God does not lie.
Scripture says, “Do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward.” Hebrews 10:35
Confidence. In what? In things? In circumstances? In people? No, in God. In Him. Our confidence is in Him. Just like our hope.
There is a song called “Everlasting God.” It says, “I will remain confident in this – I will see the goodness of the Lord. We set our hope on you. We set our hope on your love. We set our hope on the One who is the everlasting God.”
This is our focus – Him.
And if we focus on Him, the worries of sitting in a stagnant pool will fade because we will be looking up at the sun and not looking around at the pool.
Trust in Him. Your hope may fade, but don’t let it die. Listen to what David finally concluded in each of those Psalms where he seemed so desperate.
“Offer sacrifices of the righteous, and trust in the Lord . . .” Psalm 4:5
“But I have trusted in Your lovingkindness; my heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because He has dealt bountifully with me.” Psalm 13:5-6
Although at times our hopes fade, they do not die, because true hope is Him.
“You can’t save the world in a bad mood.” I heard that quote on Glenn Beck from a liberal journalist who was quite possibly one of the best guys I have ever heard speak. I tried to find his name but I have failed, so this is a shout out to him. He is so right. You can’t save the world in a bad mood.
You can’t do it. So all us – me included – need to pick ourselves up by our bootstraps and “keep on breathing” even if our hopes waver a bit. If you are in a stagnant pool, look up to the light – and keep on hoping – no matter what.
It’s time to save the world a little piece at a time. And our hopes need to be high to do it.